Kim Wilbanks

Once upon a time, there was a girl. A quiet girl who loved to read books. She grew up in a medium-sized home in a medium-sized town and enjoyed spending time with her family, especially her grandparents. She spent most Sundays with them.

The girl’s grandparents took her to church on Sundays. The entire family would gather for lunch afterward, and then she would spend the afternoon with them before returning to church for the evening worship service. Her grandparents and a group of friends would go out for a light dinner after church. One couple was Leon and Mildred Wilbanks. The girl didn’t know it but they would become her father-in-law and mother-in-law. 

This girl also loved weddings. She loved everything about them; the beautiful gowns, the colorful bridesmaid dresses, the flowers, and, especially, the wedding cake. Her grandparents knew how much she loved weddings, so they often took her with them. (Back when weddings would take place in the church, receptions were in the fellowship hall, and they would invite the entire congregation). The girl daydreamed about her future wedding.

The girl grew up, graduated from high school, and went to college. She met a young man in college and thought she was in love, but she was mistaken. When she would come home from college on the weekends, she would go to church with her grandparents. Leon and Mildred Wilbanks’s daughter was the leader of her college and career class at her church. 

She graduated from college and went back to her medium-sized home in her medium-sized town and looked for a job. When she returned home, she continued attending the church she had grown up attending. After a few weeks, she noticed a young man. She knew who he was, that he existed, but she did not really know him. After all, being a few years older than her, six to be exact, they were never in the same circles. She would sit on the aisle seat on the righthand side of the church just to catch a glimpse of him when he walked by to pass out the bulletins. She noticed how nice he always looked.

Well, the girl’s grandfather, a cousin, and the young man’s sister put their heads together and decided they needed to help move things along. Matchmaking at its finest. The young man was as soft-spoken as the girl, and they thought they might never speak to one another without a little boost.

The summer after she graduated from college, the young man asked the girl on a date. They enjoyed themselves so much that they went on more dates. They spent hours talking to one another and eventually fell in love. This time, it was real.

In a back story, the girl had heard from her mother all her life how her mother, grandmother, and great-grandmother had all married at age twenty-three. The girl listened to this story so much that she determined she would NOT get married when she was twenty-three. She would be twenty-two or twenty-four, but not twenty-three. Naturally, the young man proposed to the girl on her twenty-third birthday. Not willing to wait a full year simply to spite her mother, the girl married the young man on April 6, 1984, when she was twenty-three.

The young couple faced some difficult things in the first few years of their marriage; the girl’s beloved grandfather died, their first pregnancy ended in miscarriage, the young man’s father developed Alzheimer’s and died, then two years later he lost his mother. Through these difficult times, the young man and the girl clung to their faith and each other.

They eventually had two children, a boy and a girl. They did all the things; church, Sunday School, children’s choir, Cub Scouts, dance lessons, youth soccer, band, chorus, football. They went on family trips together, often to the mountains of North Carolina or the beach. They traveled with the girl’s parents, her brother, and his family on ski trips. Their days were full when their children were growing up. 

Eventually, the two children grew up and left for college; both, surprisingly, in Alabama. The now not-so-young man and grownup girl enjoyed visiting their children in their college towns but enjoyed it even more when they came home. Alas, the children left the nest for good and settled in their college towns. They each eventually married and began the circle all over again. The son had a son, so the young man and the girl experienced the joy of becoming grandparents. 

The not-so-young-man has been the old girl’s rock for forty years now. She has leaned on him for four decades, especially these past two heart-breaking years. He has graciously put up with her many questionable suggestions like opening a Hallmark store, moving into the same neighborhood as his in-laws, getting a dog, and getting another dog after experiencing a year without one. She has graciously put up with a non-stop calendar of sporting events, some in person, most on television. (Did you know June is the best non-sport month? Perhaps that is why there are so many weddings).

Who knows what the future holds for these two? Whatever it is, I’m sure it will involve travel, the beach, the mountains, the Lord and each other. 

Happy 40th Anniversary to the best man I know. Truly my best friend.