What do I do next? That’s a question that’s on my mind right now. I’ve got some huge holes in my life right now: a book project wrapped up, and I’ve lost my parents; my kids and grandkids are hundreds of miles off. How do I fill in the gaps? There are so many possibilities.
A Writer’s Life
I finished my first book last summer. It took six years, but I finally got it published at year’s end. A common question I hear from friends is, “When will you write your next one?” Yikes! I feel like I need to catch my breath first. I have some ideas, and I’m sure I will write more. In the meantime, I will continue writing my blog about life in the empty nest, especially as it pertains to grandparenting.
Writing can be an isolating endeavor. As a writer, you spend a lot of time alone. For me, part of that was feeling a little guilty about doing anything other than writing when I was trying to finish my book. But even introverts need a little friend time.
Steeped In History
My first career was teaching U.S. History to eighth graders in a nearby small town. While the age group was challenging, I loved the subject. My love of history and family led me to join a couple of organizations, and I am awaiting official membership in a third.
One of my favorite events is the Grandfather Mountain Highland Games in North Carolina. My husband and I try to attend every year. All the different clans have hospitality tents surrounding the field. I always noticed the Wardlaw Clan because my dad’s middle name was Wardlaw, a family name. He went by the name Ward. The summer after my dad passed, I officially joined the Wardlaw clan (they have a beautiful purple tartan). One of the Wardlaw ancestors was Hugh Wardlaw, who was an officer in the Revolutionary War Battle of Ninety-Six.
The summer my mom died, I turned in my paperwork to join DAR, Daughters of the American Revolution. I submitted my ancestor, Hugh Wardlaw, but the registrar found another link to a different ancestor through my great-aunts. I am enjoying this group with its field trips, tea talks, and service projects. Hopefully, I will take part in their book club next year.
Through DAR, I have become acquainted with and reacquainted with friends, including a distant cousin. One of these new friends invited me to a Colonial Dames meeting. Because of my great-aunts’ love of family history and a cousin’s extensive research, we have a thick book of family history tracing our heritage back to the Mayflower and beyond. The registrar of Colonial Dames has submitted my paperwork, and now we’re waiting.
A New Game In Town
Our neighborhood recently built a pickle ball court complex. My mother gave me a pickle ball paddle before they even broke ground. I have taken some lessons and I enjoy it even though I am not athletic at all. It feels good to get outdoors and do something physical. And besides that, I can use the exercise.
I also started attending a Bible study group in the neighborhood. I regularly attended Bible studies at my church while my kids were at home. It was more difficult when my kids moved away, as we often traveled to visit them. I’m enjoying this new Bible study closer to home. It is the type of study where if you have to miss a week, you don’t feel you’re way behind.
The recent pandemic introduced us to Zoom meetings. I’m still involved in a couple of groups: a writing community and an artsy one. I’m a creative person, so I enjoy every other Sunday afternoon working on artsy things with several women around the country. The women in the writing group have become friends. Three of us recently had an in-person meetup. Fun!
Oh, The Possibilities
Some other things that have popped up include:
- An Antique Club
- PEO (Philanthropic Educational Organization)
- Majong
- Hand and Foot (a group of friends who met for many years pre-COVID)
- Volunteering
- Watercolor Classes
These options are besides the project to declutter my house and the many trip albums I want to make.
The one thing that isn’t on the list is babysitting grandkids, as several of my friends have the privilege of doing. I’m currently in the category of visiting grandmother. But it’s always too long between visits. Thank goodness for the ability to travel and airline points.
Choosing Wisely
There are so many things to choose from, and at my age, I want to do all the things while I still can. But I need to be wise and choose the right things, not just do things to fill my calendar. This is a season of exploring, waiting, and seeking wisdom from the Lord. As spring blooms, I eagerly anticipate what God has planned for me next.
How about you? Are you in a season of waiting between stages and wondering what to do next? I’d love to hear.
Kim Wilbanks 